The Kindergartner: "Mom, I have something that's gonna make you funny. It's gonna make you snort."
Me: "Oh really?" (Steeling myself for a joke that involves a moose with underwear on it's head)
The Kid: "I'M ON LOVE WITH IAN!" (that's not a typo. she said she's "on love")
Me: "Oh my. Is Ian in your class?"
The Kid: "Yes, I told my new friend today that I love him and then I told her to go tell him."
Me: "What's your new friends name?"
The Kid: "I don't know."
Me: "Well, what is special about Ian? Is he funny?"
The Kid: "No."
Me: "Is he smart?"
The Kid: "No."
Me: "Does he have a job or a 5 year plan?"
The Kid: "NO! He's haaaandsome like Prince Charming."
Me: "Well, he sounds like a nice boy."
The Kid: "Don't worry mom, I still love you more than Ian."
Me: "I'm not worried. God gave you such a big heart so you can love lots of people. Like me AND Dad AND Maggie AND Ian."
The Kid: (now singing, lullaby style, as we snuggle in to fall asleep) "Moooom, I love you more than cereal. You are my mah ah ah om. I love you more than farts and elephants. I la la love you....."
I fell asleep with a warm, fuzzy feeling knowing that I am loved more than farts and elephants.
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