Friday, June 29, 2012


You know the line from that song "summer time and the livin' is easy...."  Yeah. A Stay At Home Mother of Two Preschoolers did NOT write those lyrics.

What we haven't done in our three short weeks:

been able to find the floor in Maggie's room
brushed our hair
figured out how to make it to swim class on time
figured out how to keep the swimsuits from smelling like wet farts
gone to the science museum
done a short daily "school lesson" to keep from losing all our smarts

It's not like we've been laying around watching t.v. all summer (cough cough). There have been bouts of serious activity. Such as practicing our criminal investigation skills.

Our first case study involved a decapitated mermaid

We found our suspect and after some intense interogation methods (read:waterboarding)
we got our confession

I wanted to wrap this up nicely, but I hear an aerosol can spraying which means one of two things:
We are going to have to repaint our sweet little rental, or the floor will be properly greased to bake cookies on.  Gotta run.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Pssst...over here

Pssssst.....over here..... it's me.  You may not recognize me because I've been doing all sorts of self-improvement things.  Things like taking my vitamins (the real ones, not just prozac), and sewing classes and eating less bread.  (Last night I dreamt about a giant peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It's been an entire week since that delicious item has passed these lips.)  Also, I've been stepping out of my comfort zone. I even took the skin off salmon for our dinner the other night. (No, I didn't have to clean the whole fish...just that part that they leave on the fillet. Baby steps, people, baby steps).

Let's not forget that I almost did one whole chin up without assistance this very morning.  (I just took a very humble bow.)

I've said it before and I'll say it again....It ain't easy bein' me. So, you can imagine how hard it is to be an even BETTER me. 

What new things are you trying these day?  Leave a comment. There's no prize. I...just like to hear from you. That's all.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Out Of Sorts

I found myself out of sorts this week. Yesterday, a friend asked me if something was wrong because I wasn't speaking, just nodding my head. I didn't know I was doing it. I tried to think if anything was wrong. No, nothing out of the ordinary. I shook my head no and carried on with whatever it was that was to be carried on with.  I started a mental inventory. In three minutes I came up with the following:

I hope we sleep through the night more than just the once so far this month.  I wonder if showing up to swim lessons early will help get Maggie adjusted so she doesn't cry the whole time.  I wonder if I should switch Rylee to the advanced swim class. Uhg. I have to get that chocolate stain out of the carpet when we get home. Did I take my vitamins (and by "vitamins", I mean prozac)? Did I give the girls their vitamins?  How long has that load been sitting in the washing machine? I wonder if we'll get to stay in Florida for the next school year? Why can't I eat as much chocolate as I want and still lose weight? Will I ever be able to do one chin up?  Did I say my prayers today? Man, there are a lot of people that need prayer right now.  What are we going to do the rest of the day? I wonder how long I'll have to take the brunt of Rylee's growing pains aggression. Should I start spanking Maggie for sticking her tongue out at me? Speaking of sticking out, both of them need new shoes. I should probably balance the checkbook before we go on a shopping spree. I hope our renters in Minnesota don't up and leave. Or maybe they should?  Is it too soon to send out birthday party invites? Ooh. I have to remember to get bananas. Man, I'm tired.

So today, instead of just wallowing in questions and indecision and to-do lists, I made a choice.  Today, I would make the choice to eat right.  I would fuel my body with things that would give me energy instead of comfort (read: chocolate covered raisins, chocolate ice cream and peanut butter and jelly samiches). My friend suggested a website that has meal plans. The first one sounded disgusting. But I made it anyway.   Salmon Salad Topped with Fruit Salsa and a Side of 12 Grain Toast with Hummus Spread

Turns was pretty.
Pretty delicious too.

What do you do when you are out of sorts? Leave a comment, and I will mail you the rest of the chocolate covered raisins that are in the pantry. (We seldom have give-aways on Seriously, but when we are they good ones.)  

(I wish I hadn't talked so much about the chocolate covered raisins, because now I want to eat the very ones I have promised to those who leave a comment.)

(It's a big bag. Plenty for MA and LA who always leave a remark. I'm hoping they don't like them.)

(Oh for Pete's sake. Leave a comment already so I can get them out of my house.)

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Zumba Man

Today, as I was limping out of The Club, I looked over at the Zumba class and saw a man in a wheelchair - right smack in the middle of the craziness. He was rockin' it and spinin' around better than I did on two legs.  He was the real live, adult version of that kid on Glee.

It takes big cojones for a man to go to Zumba class. It takes even bigger cojones to go to Zumba class in a wheelchair.  It takes especially large cojones to be in a wheelchair, and not pick a spot off to the side or at the very back of the class.  This whole scene made me happy. Just seeing him made me want to take the world by the horns.  Ah... to live without fear of....fill in the blank. To put myself out there and do something. To not look at my limitations or hurdles and just go for it.

So what happened next? What did I do with this new found inspiration?

Nothing. Nada. Zilch.  I got home, passed the pile of dishes in the sink, went to the pantry for a snack and proceeded to ignore the children while I perused Facebook.   Who knows though, maybe it wasn't all lost on me. I mean, it's only 4pm. There's still plenty of day left to spread my wings and take flight.

Or not. I mean really. It's already 4pm.  Carpe Diem? or Carpe Nap'em.  I think we all know where this is going.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Hint Hint

Let me set the scene.  We are driving to the bookstore. Rylee (whom we have previously, lovingly, referred to as The Taz - but are considering re-nicknaming The WeatherMan as she dictates the climate in our home) was sitting behind me in the car.

In a sing songy way she says, not really to me, but obviously for my benefit "Hey mom, when are we going to Sea World? Oh that's right....NEVER!"

Later that evening after reading books to Maggie, my sweet cub start singing me a lullaby. "Go asweep momma. Dream dream dream momma.  Go SeaWorld momma."

I may have to call Captain Obvious to help me figure out what they are trying to hint at.


Monday, June 11, 2012


Isn't funny how your mind flashes back to the weirdest stuff.  My flashback happened as I was zipping up my tennis skort this morning. I happens to zip up the back side:

(insert dreamy wavy screen that indicates we are going back in time approximately 15 years ago)

I was working at a property management company. It was called Property Management Services. Their logo was PMS. Really. Why would I make that up.  Anyway, one day a tenant came in a and needed a copy of his lease.  He was really cute. But also, his roommate had just taken his own life. In the very apartment my employer was renting to him. A messy situation indeed. So, instead of being my normal charming (read: flirty) self, I put on my most serious help-me-help-you face while dealing with him.

He needed some copies of things. I was walking back and forth between he and the copy machine, then back to him then back to the file cabinet. I must have turned my back to him at least 5 times during that encounter.  Each time I returned, he seemed to smile a little bigger at me. So I let down my serious face and returned to my more charming self.

As he left the office, and I returned to my desk, my co-worker/roommate John discreetly informed me that the zipper was down on the back of my skirt.  I think I may have been a little embarrassed. But looking back now, I think I can feel good that I was able to put a smile on someone's face who was probably in a pretty dark place.

This concludes our episode of Flashbacks with Nikki.  See you next time on Maybe I should have been a little more embarrassed.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Lottery Winner

When My Chef and I were married, I almost botched the ceremony...a couple of times.  The first was when the pastor asked "Will, honor, yada yada yada."  I was thrown off.  Every girl who has ever played out her wedding in her head always answers "I Do."   But our pastor didn't ask "DO you promise?"  He asked "WILL you?"   So I wasn't going to get to say it how I'd been mentally practicing my whole life?  After a short stumble, I got it out. "I WILL."   

The second time I tried to botch the ceremony was when I thought our pastor forgot to say "Kiss the Bride."  So I whispered it to him. A few times.  But that has nothing to do with today's story. So, let's move on.

Anyway, the first year after we were married, we actually took our rings off at night. And each morning, while brushing our teeth,  we put them back on, looked at each other and mumbled through toothpaste foamed mouths "I will."  

Once the children were born and the sleepless nights started, we stopped taking our rings off. Let's face facts, we were lucky if we even remembered to brush our teeth. The less sleep we got, the less we said in the morning. Some days, with our eyebrows in full scowl position, the only thing we grumbled to each other was "love you."  Because we vowed "I WILL love you in crabby-ness and health" or something like that.

Last night was one of those sleepless nights. I'll spare you the details about the crying and yelling and gnashing of teeth.  But what I will tell you is that this morning when I woke up and realized that My Chef had let me sleep in, while he was trying to placate the children and running late for work, that I won the lottery the day I married him.

Friday, June 1, 2012

So Relaxing

Maggie got a haircut last week.  Apparently, it was super relaxing.