Monday, July 25, 2011

The horra

Because a lot of my daily tasks do not require so much brain power as they do sheer will power, I have a lot of time in my head to think about things. Sometimes these thoughts lead to some pretty good ideas. However, sometimes when the wheels get to turnin', very very bad ideas, cloaked in the cover of brilliance, come to fruition.

Here's how it came about this time.

Summer vacation starts in 9 days. (Woo Hoo) What won't I be doing whilst on vacation? Going to the YMCA. What's the single most important thing that happens at the YMCA? I shave my legs.  At the YMCA (as opposed to home) no one (so far) has come into my shower while I am shaving asking what I'm doing and wanting to take a blade to their own wee little peach fuzzy legs. At the YMCA I do not have to rush out of the shower because I heard a crash, or screaming or worse yet, no noise at all.

So as I was wondering around The Boutique last week day dreaming about days at the lake, I thought about having to shave everyday under the watchful eye of my offspring. Just as this thought occurred, I looked up and saw a waxing kit.  I have never had my legs waxed. Ever. But really, how hard could it be?

Here's how it went down.

2:20pm - Read directions twice. Nothing really tricky. Pictures included.

2:23pm - Warmed up wax in microwave

2:25pm - Spread wax onto thin / long section of left shin. Slight burning sensation from heat. Bearable.

2:26pm - Apply paper strip to wax. Smooth over. Totally confident. Everything looks like the pictures.

2:27pm - Pull off paper strip. The horra begins. Pulled too slowly. No hair on strip. Half the wax / skin gone.

2:28pm - Take deep breath. Re-apply hot wax / paper strip. Not as pleasant with raw / irritated skin.

2:29pm - Zip off paper fast.

2:29pm - Gasp for breath and feel words that would make a trucker proud rise up in my throat.

2:30pm - Look around corner to see Tazmanian watching whole scene and try to answer barrage of questions the easiest of which is "Is that a big band-aid?"

2:31pm - Look at "test area" on leg and see no noticeable hair removal. Pack up waxing kit and whisper a sweet vow to my armpits to never ever put them through that.


  1. Kevin and Thomas let me wax their big toes once. See you so soon.

  2. When I was in africa the women were HORRIFIED that I had hair on my arms... "umm excuse me it is blonde and so short it is hardly able to be seen!" anyway I let them talk me into waxing them with this crazy african wax that looks like a ball of amber. Anyway they did one tiny bit and I freaked. NEVER AGAIN.

  3. Only you Rue, only you!