Monday, May 23, 2011

A Letter to My Little Ladies

Dear Rylee and Maggie,

This morning I realized that "molding" you two into extraordinary women looks a lot less like a Cotton commercial and more like a recording of the following phrases:

Get Down From There
Stop that right now
That's a good way to get hurt
No more jumping off the tables
Yes, that was funny, but I don't think it's a good idea
Come here this instant
Put the knife down
Put your clothes back on
Put your clothes back on
Put your clothes back on
At least put some shorts on
Come here
In a minute, not yet....

If there is one thing I can teach you other than to not hit each other, it's this.  Should you ever find yourself at a karaoke bar and someone says "Let's streak!"  Don't do it. Even if you are young and have the body to...just don't. People don't forget that kind of thing.  Even 16 years later.

Your very conservative and modest Momma

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